The World's Worst Sober Driver
by LonelyButLovely
Summary: Sango just might make the world's first human smoothie with her car.


Okay. It's official. You see that raven-haired girl with a terrified expression on her face? That's me. Kagome Higurashi. And I am most definitely not having my best day.

Do you notice the silver-haired, golden-eyed hunk over there? The one muttering curses under his breath constantly? That's Inuyasha. He's my best friend.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention the unfortunate guy with his violet eyes in the front seat next to my other friend. He's looking a bit _too_ green for my liking right now.

And that's about all. Let's start with the story of my life. One more thing...meet Sango. The world's worst sober driver.

**.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•***

"HOLY _SHIT!"_

Lovely language, eh?

Worst moment ever. All of us were late for school. Why? I forgot my lunch. We were all in Sango's car. Why? She insisted we take a spin in her new blue Mercedes-Benz. We all wished for a red light. Why? Nothing was stopping us from becoming the next human smoothie.

"Sango! Slow down!" Inuyasha shouted gripping onto his seat belt. "Are you trying to get us killed?"

"Sorry!" She shouted back as we curbed another sharp turn.

"That was the - " Kagome was whipped forward then back, " - wrong turn Sango!"

Miroku swallowed and gripped his armrest for dear life. "Maybe, it's best if you listen to their advice."

She swung the wheel around. "Don't worry, I've got it all down."

"SANGO!" They all said in unison.

"What?" She banked yet another sharp turn. "I didn't think it'd be so fast."

"We'll be late for sure," Kagome said miserably from her seat. I didn't wake up on time, skipped breakfast, forgot my shoes and had to get them, forgot my lunch, had to call for a ride, and here I was, regretting every moment of it.

"Couldn't you have starved?" Inuyasha said as his head banged against the window. Ouch. That had to hurt.

"Lunch is a necessary time for me because I'm a growing – BITCH!" She shouted as her face made contact with the front seat.

"Glad you admit you're one." He muttered. She tried not to smile smugly as his face made contact with a flying hairbrush. But of course, she settled for the alternative. Laughing.

"That's what you get!" She sniggered. He held his cheek and scowled at me. But I laughed in his face. "Serves you right!"

"WRONG TURN SANGO!" Miroku yelled. That guy sure had some lungs. Maybe he should join choir or something.

"AHHHHHH!" They all screamed as they did a swerving-slash-u-turn.

Hmm, an a-flat I think.

"Hang on!" Sango said, her tongue slightly sticking out in concentration.

"Tell us beforehand!" Inuyasha shouted, fear ebbing away from commonsense. He was at the edge of his seat, ready to jump for it.

She shrugged slightly and then we slowed as a red light lit up like a beacon in the darkness. They were guaranteed whiplash after this. I'm sure of it. We all breathed a sigh of relief, silently praying that the green light was broken. Sango tapped impatiently on the wheel as the cars crossed in front of her. Miroku was leaning against the seat, trying to pacify his churning stomach contents. Inuyasha was trying not to hyperventilate and I was unbuckled trying to gather my belongs, as you noticed, they were flying around the car. Then, all our expressions – minus Sango's – turned into the same horrified expression as the red light changed to green. And we're off with a screech of tires and car honks. It's only a wonder we haven't got a ticket – better yet, police squad after us. My math homework sailed out the window and I watched in terror as it got ran over by a semi. That's right. A _semi truck._

"S-Sango." I blubbered, forgetting about my seat belt. "My homework."

"You'll get over it." She waved her hand dismissively. "It's not like you needed it."

"Mr. Myoga's gonna have my head," I moaned putting my face in my hands. Inuyasha reached to put a comforting hand on her shoulder but – _ahem,_ Sango's driving – intervened and he ended up whacking her on the back of her head. "Hey! What was that for asshole?"

He pulled his hands back with wide eyes. "I didn't mean to!"

"Sango! He hit me!" I pointed at him and with another turn, it accidentally jabbed his eye.

"Ow! Hey!" He shouted angrily. He hurled a tissue box at my head. "She poked me in the eye!"

I let the box sail out the window and frowned at him. "He did it first!"

"By accident!" He rolled his eyes.

A soda can hit us both on the head and we turned to glare at it, our fight forgotten. At that moment, Sango made another sharp turn and we all jerked to one side. We had just pulled into the school parking lot; with much relief if I might add. She grinned in triumph and slid a hand over the seat to look back at us. I was huddling on Inuyasha's lap like a frightened baby and realized this immediately. Blushing like crazy, I rolled off and tried to take deep, calming breaths.

"See? Record time." Sango said smugly.

"Record time?" Miroku said looking at the clock. "We're twenty minutes late! How is that record time?"

"Because." Sango drawled on, glancing back at him. "We're usually half an hour late. See the ten minute difference?"

"Right now," Miroku said shakily, "I'm seeing stars."

"Am I included?" Sango added batting her eyelashes.

"Get me out of this death machine!" Kagome said frantically pulling at the doors. "They're not opening! Don't tell me they won't open! Sango, oh please. God, be merciful and I swear I'll do my homework every night!"

Sango rolled her eyes. As much as it was amusing to her, she had to let her out. With a dramatic sigh, she unlocked all the doors with one push of a button and Kagome tumbled out unceremoniously n a flurry of pencils and papers. She got up with a cry of relief and brushed off her knees.

"Thank you!" I said to no one in particular. The rest of them came out of the doors in a dignified fashion compared to Kagome's exit.

"Well," Sango shrugged and locked her car. "At least that's done and over with."

"We better get a move on," Inuyasha said impatiently. "Class is pretty much half-over thanks to you."

"Me?" Sango said innocently. "I drove like a bull to get here."

"And still managed to make four wrong turns, almost kill us in that thing you call a car, and we're _still late."_ Miroku sighed and rubbed his temples. He added, "But we're here in one piece, more or less."

"More or less?" Sango pouted. "What do you mean more or less?"

He sighed again and started towards the school, with her constant yapping in his ear as she shrieked about how she drove her ass around, picking us up, filling the tank, so on and so forth. Inuyasha stayed behind as Kagome picked up her now scattered belongings, waiting impatiently for her to finish. I crammed it all into my back pack and set off towards school with a happy hop in my step. Inuyasha sighed and followed.

A daily morning in my oh so wonderful life. Could you handle it?

**.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.*•.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•*.•***

**[A/N] It's me and this oneshot of a hectic morning. Yada, yada, disclaimer: I don't own the characters only the plot obviously. I don't know what to do with this. **

_~kitana411_


End file.
